Morning & Night Routines

Dear Self,

It is time to look at our daily routines. Numerous people have asked me about creating morning and night routines. To develop self-worth, we need to like ourselves, and to like ourselves, we need to take care of ourselves. We need to treat ourselves in a loving, kind way- the same way we would treat a friend or a child. Before I developed routines, my life felt like running on a track. Morning time blended to daytime, daytime blended to nighttime, and the cycle repeated with no clear start or end. I used to wake up in the morning and immediately grab my phone to see what text-messages and emails I missed. Within the first 5 minutes of waking up, I was rattled by the information I received and already started drowning myself with coffee to begin working. Nights did not look much different. I was exhausted from the day and often distracted myself with mindless television, phone scrolling, and lots of chocolate. There were many nights I fell asleep on the couch with the television blaring and my laptop on my pillow. I woke up the next morning feeling disheveled and stressed and repeated the same lap around the track.

This routine, or lack thereof, was not loving or kind. I was shocked to witness the powerful differences routines made in my life. I started to sleep better and became more productive. I felt more hopeful and energized throughout the day. I felt less stressed and overwhelmed. I felt more like a person.

There is no perfect routine. I cannot prescribe a 5-step process for you to start and end your day that will create instantaneous happiness. What works for me may not work for you. However, I invite you to look at your routines with a curious heart and see what habits you can add or delete to promote overall improved self-worth. My routines take about 30 minutes, which means I had to start waking up 30 minutes earlier to set myself up for success. Here are some of the things that work for me.

 

My Morning Routine

  • Wake up every morning at the same time.

  • Do not press snooze. Get up at the first alarm.

  • Enjoy my cup of coffee outside on the patio, admiring nature’s beauty

  • Journaling practice

  • Hygiene: brush teeth, skincare, get dressed, etc. (usually I am doing this while listening to my morning playlist or a podcast I enjoy)

  • Make my bed

  • Start the day

My Night Routine

  • DANCE PARTY: At 7pm every day, my alarm goes off reminding me to dance. My daughter and I turn up the music, get out the musical instruments, and run around the house dancing and singing until our souls are content. This activity is great solo, with kids, or with a partner. Our latest dance party song is America’s Sweetheart by Elle King.

  • Prepare for the next day: clean up the kitchen and living areas, clear all the counters, start the dishwasher, pick out my outfit for tomorrow, etc. (so I do not wakeup to pure chaos first thing in the a.m.)

  • Journaling practice

  • Meditation practice (5-10 minutes)

  • Hygiene: brush teeth, skincare, pajamas

  • Read

  • Sleep Meditation/Music (On nights when I struggle to quiet my thinking mind, I fall asleep to a sleep meditation with affirmations or relaxing music)

 

Some other ideas to include in your routine:

  • Light candles

  • create morning and night music playlists

  • Stretch or do yoga

  • Practice gratitude

  • Do a cold exposure

  • Go on a walk

  • Spend some time outside

  • Repeat affirmations or mantras

  • Exercise

  • Listen to a podcast

I want to name that no human being will follow the routines exactly the same way, every single day. We will mess up and make mistakes. This is part of the human experience. Some days we will be in a poor mood and choose to not engage in our routines. I still have some nights where I find myself on the couch with a bowl of chocolate chips, rewatching The Office for the 57th time instead of following my routines. This happens, but it happens far less than it used to (which was every night). I do not shame myself for these rough nights anymore, but I am less inclined to repeat them because I do not feel good after I do that. I do not like feeling sluggish in the morning from eating a whole bag of chocolate chips. I do not like waking up to a messy house. I do not like living in chaos anymore.

To find what works for you, allow yourself to explore various options to see what resonates and what does not. It is important to remember that routines are to be repeated daily, and therefore, need to be sustainable. It needs to be practical. It needs to be doable. It needs to be enjoyable. It needs to be YOU, not your friends, therapist, or even perfect Patricia from Pinterest.

                                                                                                                                    xoxo,

                                                                                                                                    Self

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Letter to my Inner Child